Hey you! How are you doing today? Hope you have a great week ahead! I just got back from Pune today and there was something that made my energy low as I started thinking over certain things about myself. And all this only because of an incident that happened earlier today.
It could be a stupid thing too, where someone might tell you that you are cribbing for a small thing. But may be for you it's something more than just a small irrelevant thing. It's more about how far you reached and why you feel a particular way now.
Everyone's lookout is always going to be different and you can never really change that. I'm calling this post " The Change " because when I sat down today and thought about the kind of person I have become now, I saw change. The way things have changed for me professionally and personally, it's incredibly deep and spiritual. And there's so much to learn from your own self.
Sometimes when you feel low, which we all do at times, we wonder why we feel this way and if a particular reason is the cause behind that void and emptiness. No. It's meant for you to realise things about you and get you feeling more motivated!
Professionally things have changed a lot for me and there's no questioning the fact that I LOVE WHAT I DO. There's nothing to complain about. But ofcourse, there's another story to what goes on behind the camera. I feel blogging is a form of acting, sort of like performing. So what I do is what I love but what you see is not what my life is all about.
When I started, it was just something to do without even putting a lot of effort or thought into it, it came to me naturally and I enjoyed it thoroughly. When your passion becomes your profession, there's a lot of pros and cons to it because then you are doing it with all your potential, you are investing more time, sometimes all your time. Days with long hours and more effort start seeping in and at the same time you are working, not just for yourself but also for someone else. Everything evolves. Things change, priorities change, people change. I was 1/1 when I was just doing it for fun, now probably 1/4 and at the same time I also have to get things approved from another set of people who has given me the job. This only means that initially I was all by myself and now, it's a team work. So while all these things happen, things change. It can't be the same. And change is good! It's always good and it's always for the better. I remember being more active on snapchat one and an half year before... now it's different. Because when I was studying and doing this, everything was just about interacting and putting up my personality on social media and having fun. Now it's changed because now it's also about me being an independent woman and giving my 100% to what I have on the table.
So all this writing was just because I felt low today. Did I ever plan to start a blog? No. Did I ever plan to write this content for today's post? NO. But I'm someone who likes sharing things and if you have been following me, you will know that about me. This year has been a little different; professionally it's been great, I'm doing things and I'm sure you must have seen me evolve, learn, and grow from the way its all turning out. I'm grateful to the Universe, to you all who appreciate and to the brands who love my work and think I have the potential to create.
My body has changed. And personally? A lot has changed may be that's the reason I said, what you see is not what my life is all about and that's the reason I also related this career to being an actor, a performer. All these things happening on the internet is like things on a stage, a platform and the things that are going up is just like a play, it is not my life. So what happens before and after the play? There's a lot of thought, a lot of practise and planning! And ofcourse some time for yourself to relax, finish your other commitments and you just get busy being yourself!
I don't even share a lot about what's happening in my personal life, it's the change that I'm talking about, I feel good, I like keeping things to myself and enjoy my space.
We all have some kind of a relationship with parents, friends, your lovers, your siblings ... and that means you have so many commitments. And then you have yourself! There's always so much happening that sometimes everything is too overwhelming and you might realise that the stupidest thing has triggered a feeling of sadness or a loss of energy. But I don't want to talk about anything negative because my intention to write what I feel is not to make someone else low! Haha! It's all about feeling motivated again, feeling good about yourself, and giving something to someone. I miss the meet ups, I know I haven't had a lot of them lately and I do read your messages for a meet up when I travel! May be feeling this way today was the order of the day because I want to meet you all soon. If someone thinks I'm motivating or inspiring you then I want to meet you and be able to do that! Probably I would be starting to do this again soon, would start with Mumbai and then let's see where all can we arrange one!
I want to thank you all for being so understanding and supportive! It feels greaaat, but yes be aware that what I do is my work and not my life, I don't want anyone to get carried away! I really hope you had a great great great day today! And while I was feeling all this, I just gave a little time to myself and was looking up something over the internet to just me make myself feel better and it definitely did! It was much needed!
Though you know all of this, you just need to revise your lessons to keep going! So may be that's why I felt a particular way today because this revision was needed! And to you who's made it till the end of my post, oh well, it's all connected you know, may be you needed this as well and may be I am the medium! So I thank that feeling of mine today! There's a real reason behind everything:)
Go watch it, I'm sharing it with you because I felt amazing after listening to it! It's about the audio and not the video! Get your life lessons right! You are amazing!
I always like adding a visual story to my write ups, this was a test shoot I recently shot with Mrinmai and it just goes so well with what I'm trying to say. There are always two sides to things, what you see is not really what it is. This is me trying to learn more things about myself in this journey. Learning, growing and evolving. I see the change in me, and I see the change around me! It's all for the good! 💗
This is a line from the video that I wanna hightlight and end this story, "Have a mind that's open to everything and attached to nothing!" :)
Photos by Mrinmai Parab
--- Good Vibes ---